judging a book by its cover

at first glance, he was someone i would cross the street on the other side as soon as i saw coming my way. that typical thug look.  silver chains, hat sideways, pants down to a place that HAD to be uncomfortable, mouth full of gold teeth! that thug! At my pool! did NOT expect that.

But i stayed, and i listened, then i opened my eyes, and i looked, then-my eyes really opened and, i saw!

Here he was, with his two little girls, about 3 and 5, a couple of flotation devices, on a beautiful april afternoon, 75 degrees, sun overhead, wind blowing..spring in full bloom.

And he was yelling "Go tasha, you can do it, daddy believes in you, you can swim..my baby is learning to swim..i am so proud of my tasha, my baby girl is swimming! stay close to the side but...move your arms, stay in the ring, but..you are swimming! my baby is swimming!!
She was elated! She said "Look daddy, i'm swimming..you taught me! i can swim!!!"

and there it was...the look may be a whole lot different, but..the words..the same as when i taught MY daughters to swim! and, i was both proud and ashamed at the same time!

POINTS2PONDER: Why do we assume we know a person because of how they look, how they dress, how they walk? What if someone misjudged us? wouldn't we want them to get to know us first BEFORE judging a book by its cover?

I watched, and I smiled and I reminisced. My baby girls are turning 29 in May...seems like yesterday.

I got my things, got up and started to leave, then I stopped, turned and spoke to Daddy:
"You're a good dad. They will never forget who taught them to swim. i taught my girls just like you did! You are a good dad!"
He was surprised and blushed as I spoke..guess he had misjudged me too.

Then I said, "Enjoy them right now! you will blink, and they will be turning 29, and you will wonder, where'd the time go? and you will be beating those boys to stay away from your baby girls!"

He laughed and then said  "I'll beat them with a stick -- nobody will be good enough for my little girls! they'll have to come through me first!"

I laughed and thought...that's exactly what I used to say!
Just two dads teaching their girls to swim...twenty-five years apart! but..nothing's changed!
and I smiled all the way home...cause...some things haven't changed, have they?

Dare to Be Different

We all notice it...anyone who looks different, acts different, talks different...from the norm! We as a society talk a lot about embracing the differences, encougaging diversity, respecting dynamics that make us all unique, until...we are too unique, we stick out, we cause attention to be drawn to us. Then it's not embraced, encouraged or respected--it's noticed!

Point2Ponder: When is different too different? Why do we tell our children to be who they are and then worry that they won't fit in? Why do we allow the world to fit us into their mold, even if there's just no way we can fit! Why do we want our children to be accepted by the IN crowd when the IN crowd is going NOWHERE!!

This is where bullying (verbal, visual and physical) comes into play. We may not say it, show it or stress it, but we are just as guilty when we observe it and -- do nothing!

There's a saying that goes: All that is necessary for EVIL to continue is for good men to do nothing!

We say Dare2BDifrnt - but, all we really want is...to belong, be accepted, to be part of the group.

But...The Word says...
We are in this world, but we are NOT of this world!
The Word calls us pilgrims in a strange country!
The old hymn says we are "looking for a city, where we'll never die!"

We should be the people who accept those who do not fit in with the world..
because we should not fit in either...if we do, isn't there a Bigger problem?
So...next time you see someone with a unicorn on their head...let them know..they can swim with you!

Apex and Nadir; Splendid and Sad; My Life, Why am I so Lucky???

I have experienced the apex of passion from the love of a woman I am married to and adore and actually don't think I deserve. Every day I ask myself how did I get to lucky? She treats me like I am beautiful and adores me in a way I only dreampt of and never ever thought I would ever experience. I spent 17 years with someone never feeling like this, and now, 13 years later, it is still so incredibly out of this world wonderful! I miss her when I am not with her, and I can't get enough of her when I am with her! I now have that love that we see in the movies or read about in novels or see on the street as we pass that couple who are kissing in the rain, oblivious to gawkers or the elements-- just caught up in the moment!

I also have experienced the nadir of pain of loss, missing the 3 most important things I have ever loved- my children. They are adults now, and they make their own choices as to their relationships and their alliances and their preferences, and...they never pick me! it's always and forever, either by commission or ommission, they choose, by voice or by silence, their mom! The forever victim, which means I will always be depicted as forever the wolf! The pain I still feel everytime they choose her over me, by their time and effort and attention and consideration...always pick their mom...they can explain it away...their mom hasn't found love to replace her love for me; their mom needs them to feel love; I have love, so I don't need them as much as their mom; and their mom always has some crisis that drags them into her life, into her drama, into her drain of a life...she needs them; they think-- I do not! they are so wrong!

Point2Ponder: Is their a price life makes you pay for sheer joy, true love and pure passion? If you have one, must you forego something else you hold dear? Must you balance splendid with sad?

I usually have a tie up to the point, but..this time, I am stumped. I can tell you that the splendid is rapturous but the sad is resonating...through my soul, my heart, my body...it just aches!

So...just not sure if I have to lose to retain what I have won...guess for me, I cannot have it all. Why?